I Once Was

I used to be this confident, ambitious knew what she wanted

Type of woman

Where is she?

My days consist of thinking of YOU

What are you…uh we going to do

Where are you…uh we going to go

Where is me?

I used to be able to speak so freely

Now I feel sad, lost with the thought

Of you not loving me

Why don’t I have enough love for myself?

Why can’t eat at a table by myself?

I feel eyes watching me

Observing my mood

Why can’t I be sad and the feelings not revolve

Around you?

Why don’t people ask how I’M just doing rather it’s always

Us two

I’m sad when you’re around

But upset when I’m with you

I cry at the thought of losing you, but really I should be crying for me

I’ve become so comfortable with you that even my interests are more of yours than mines

Anime, football, baseball

I even lost interest in my painting, poetry

Not sure why

Maybe because, it did not interest you

I’ve become so dependent on you to make me happy

Make me feel a way that I once possessed the energy

To do for myself

I once could walk in a room by myself

And not look to my right

Nor My left

I feel lost but I have to find the me I was once

The one who didn’t need anyone

To make them feel complete

Cause now not only am I questioning your love

But my love for me

-SilentyBliss

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